Good-bye, Kristi!

Kristi Lechner passed away early yesterday morning. She was near to being a perfect human being, as far as I can say. Her hair was always in place, her stylish clothes were from the best stores. She was in every which way appropriate for whatever the occasion called for in dress and demeanor.

Above the level of appearance, Kristi had a kind heart. She was on the shy side which many people didn't understand. She had a good word to say about each person in her realm. She was generous and understanding.

Kristi's handwriting was excellent. Whenever she sent me a memo or a card, I always studied her brand of cursive and thought about what a good student Kristi must have been from the time she entered the classroom until she left it at retirement. 

This was a woman who truly understood how school politics worked. Think back to her "good word for everyone" policy.  It worked so well for her as she spent all those years as an effective leader at OCHS.  It was not possible to discern her prejudices, if there were any.

She had an instinct for understanding her students to their very cores. I don't think she forgot a single one of them in 30 years of teaching. I never heard her say, "Oh, I just can't  remember her name." She knew every time. She also graciously passed on hints about the best and worst things about students we'd receive from her classes so we could best serve them.  

She loved to go out to lunch on in-service days. Her classroom was always tidy and tastefully decorated. She kept meticulous to do lists.  She was on time for everything. She took everyone at his or her word. She participated in student activities with dedication and energy.

Whenever we were out and about, she always left first because she wanted to get home to Lance so he wouldn't miss her. They were devoted to each other.

All of us will miss her forever. 

Depression, Doctors, and Drugs

(I need you to know right off that I have omitted doctors' names and exact dosages of drugs mentioned in case any of my readers are even remotely connected to depressive disorder. It is so tempting to self-diagnose or to diagnose for a loved one. The internet is ultra-loaded with information about the treatment of depression and it is hard to resist self-medicating. In addition, I want to remind you to be careful about willing acceptance of what doctors have to say. Sometimes they are wrong. Question them politely but thoroughly before you follow their directions for medication. I believe that I was given reasonable advice but that the advice was not appropriate for my personal situation .Be careful with your health. It is truly the best thing you have.)

Notes from my log:

6/16/17-Bad night with wakefulness and bad anxiety. Woke with feelings of doom and gloom. EXTREMELY shaky.No appetite. Unhappy.Took a xanax around 4:00. Anxiety calmed down a bit within 20-30 min. But noticeable brain zaps, sluggish  movement. 

7/7/17-Up at 7 feeling shaky and full of dark mood. Jittery at breakfast. Decent appetite. Felt better after a long nap. Less shaky. Not horrible in p.m. Arm relaxed a little. No xanax today.

8/1/17-Shaky, moody wake up. Started my daily stint in recliner in the middle of  the a.m. Pat brought me a small lunch and I slept most of the afternoon. Small dinner and a restless evening on the couch watching TV with Pat. Cannot get comfortable.

8/21/17-Eclipse day. I cannot forget this day because this is the day I noticed I was feeling better. The improvement was only slight but doom and mood were both a bit better. My appetite is back!

9/11/17-I definitely feel better. Meds have been adjusted one more time and another one added. Doc said I'd feel better within a week and I did! Doom and gloom are GONE. Totally gone. I do get extra focused on things but not to a point of anxiety. And I can dial down my racing thoughts with some effort. Love feeling happy.

10/1/17-Am declaring myself nearly well. All that's left is shakiness and slow motion movement. Those symptoms do present some problems. I can't write very well and typing is slow with many corrections needed, for example. But I am dealing with the problems.


I am currently under the care of an excellent psychiatrist and a neurologist who is working on my shakiness. This is still a bit of a mystery but we'll figure it out. We're also still working very conservatively on my meds and making good progress.

My message to you is that I caution you once again to question every medication you take whether prescribed or over the counter. Be proactive about your health. Nobody cares about it as much as you do.