I love to read.  I remember when I badly wanted to learn to read so when I was in kindergarten, my teacher Miss Daisy (isn't that the perfect name for a kindergarten teacher?) kept a few of us after school and introduced us to Dick, Jane, Spot, and Fluffy.  Oh. Can't forget Mother and Father. Soon enough I began figuring out how to read words on my own.  My parents didn't seem too impressed but they didn't need to be because I was so proud of myself and so happy to be in this new world of words and books.

The adventures in reading began. In third grade, we got to go to the library and check out books that we could actually take home. Mary Poppins became a favorite grown-up and my cousin Patty read Winnie the Pooh to my brother and me. All those characters became real.

Junior high and high school years didn't lend themselves to much leisure reading but I still made time for recreational reading.  I saw Romeo and Juliet in Ashland when I was 15 and was hooked on Shakespeare. I carefully hid the plays under my desk and read them while my Modern Problems teacher talked in the front of the room about something important.  Her subject  couldn't have been near as intriguing as the spells cast by the witches in Macbeth or as sad as what happened to Lennie in Of Mice and Men. 

College left no time for leisure reading but what we read in literature classes captivated me. Everything from Beowulf to my favorite poet e.e. cummings became reality to me.  

After college, I started teaching literature myself so I got to spend many more hours exploring those other worlds in books. I think I read Hamlet at least a dozen times.  Interestingly, I declared in my early 20's that I wouldn't read  Hamlet until I was 30. I smugly figured I could get by without that famous Dane in my life until I was the age of Hamlet himself. I made it and still received A's in my English lit classes.  

I read everything now but I have to say that I'm glad I don't have to read student essays anymore. The Great Alone was much better and held my attention for hours.  

I highly recommend that you read that last book mentioned. What a story about life off the grid in Alaska with strong characters who battle their way through some ugly life events. I still read the newspaper on the few days we still receive it. And not one back of cereal box has gone unread in this household! 

What I Can't Write About

At first, I thought it might be a good idea to write about something related to grammar use such as it's and its.  In the olden days when people actually wrote letters, essays, and sometimes even poems, we had to know the difference in the use of these two words.  You'd get red  marks on your papers if you used them improperly.  That would be almost certain to bring up some painful memories of some English teacher you didn't like so I decided to leave a grammar lesson alone.

Maybe I could write about Michael Jackson.  Wow! He was so darn cute when he was young but then he went through all sorts of physical changes that are hard to describe except for the one my sister calls "the time when Michael Jackson really wanted to be Diana Ross."  But you can't deny the fact that he danced as if he had magic feet. Remember the fun you had when you tried to moonwalk? That was always great for some laughs at family gatherings.  But rule out Michael Jackson for a topic. You'd be hard put to omit a comment or two about his strange lifestyle. 

Hey!  I've got it!  FOOTBALL!  After all, the season is upon us.  Just try driving I-5 south or north around college game schedules.  You'll see for yourself how popular this sport is as you count the cars flying orange or green flags. And you'll have to remember which cousin likes which professional team so loud arguments are avoided.  I've had football games playing in the background of my weekends all my life but I still don't know what it means when the referee (or is it the umpire?) grasps one wrist with the other using what looks like an up and down motion. And I can NEVER resist mentioning how barbaric and dangerous the game is and how much it reminds me of slaves being forced to fight well-equipped soldiers in ancient Rome.  Boy, do I get the ugly looks from that.  So football won't do for a topic.

Lastly, I can't write about the Supreme Court or any nominees who might surface from the oily cesspool of current politics.

Okay. Maybe just a couple of remarks.  One: Republicans aren't what they used to be when they were a real political party.  Two:  Can two people be lying and telling the truth at the same time?  And, three:  Why do we feel so powerless about what's going on in Washington, D.C?

Maybe I should just stick with the it's versus its rule after all.    

  

KItchen Time-NOT!

I've spent 50 years preparing food first by helping my mother with her family cooking and following up with cooking for my own family. I just have to share a few examples and some random thoughts about what food means to me.


First of all, I'll just come out and say it:  I'm tired of the kitchen. Every evening I put  together a simple protein meal accompanied by a fruit and a vegetable. It's fairly easy and if Pat wants anything else, he prepares it himself. 

Furthermore, I am no longer interested in fixing holiday meals.I broke the news early in the year that we are going out for Thanksgiving, joining close friends (thanks, Penny!) for a Christmas morning brunch, and planning other holiday events around easy potlucks. Such a plan will avoid the sticky discussion about who will join whom for the special meal and I won't have to ever again try to make the Norman Rockwell scene of the family being served the just perfect turkey. Too, my house will stay uncluttered with crumb free counters and the ugly dead carcass in the refrigerator. No  more turkey soup for days on end.

In my early years of working with food, I pored over recipes in women's magazines and began collecting cookbooks until I couldn't fit them into regular kitchen space.  My first cookbook was The Hate To Cook Book  by Peg Bracken. It is now held together with rubber bands and paper clips and I can't give it up. I kept a few others such as Peg's other books and one or two others with titles like Five Ingredient Recipes and 100 Crockpot Recipes. I also have a 3-ring binder loaded with recipes I've received or stolen from other people. That's it. The whole collection fits on one slim shelf in my pantry.

And here's my cooking confession:  I fed my kids baby food from jars found at the grocery store, bologna sandwiches and Doritos for lunch, and dinners with iceberg lettuce salad or even the horrifying "fruit" salad made from Jello! All I really needed in my pantry was instant rice, a can or two of cream of whatever soup, some frozen vegetables and an occasional banana or apple. I served all this with fried cube steak, fried chicken, or spaghetti made from sauce that included fried ground sirloin (read hamburger). Guess what. . .we're all alive and successfully passing by organic foods with each visit to the grocery store.

So here's a little test for you. And if you can get 100%, I'll share a box of See's Candy with you.  

Identify and/or describe the following: 
1. kohlrabi
2. pomegranate molasses
3. castelvetrano olives
4. piment d'espelette
5. cotija cheese

I found these items in a local paper and a woman's magazine so don't think I've gone all snobbish and read one of those gourmet magazines. I still prefer one pan meals that can be on the table in 20 minutes.

P.S. Just sayin'- my family all sat together for the evening meal and were often joined by the kids' friends who marveled over this ancient eating custom wondering where we kept our TV trays. 

Another Health Journey

The journey has lasted over a year. It began with heedless changing of anti-depressants and, I hope, started to end yesterday.

All of my readers (I think I have as many as eight) know that I was diagnosed late in the Spring of 2017 with major depressive disorder after seeing a slew of doctors. I finally ended up with a reputable, solid, and most likable psychiatrist who was the one who offered the diagnosis. Then we were off to figuring out which meds would provide the most relief.

We carefully tried some combinations of a pinch of this and a a dab of that and ended up with two different anti-depressants and one mood stabilizer. So along with my heart medications, I have a handful of pills that I choke down morning and night. I began to feel some better but am still working with some depression and a boatload of anxiety.

 My world has diminished to a very small comfort zone just as I started to contemplate a thrilling trip to somewhere fun, beautiful, and exciting. Ireland? Italy? Maybe one of those scenic river cruises where you can float by fancy castles on the nearby hills and take a cooking class along the way as well? Truth is, my travel radius has narrowed down to about five miles, ten on a good day.

Then the trembling and shaking and overall weakness along with stiffness and a new and unsightly walking posture made getting around even my own house began. And so did despair. Mornings became nearly unbearable and I didn't really relax until late afternoon or evening.

Last week my psychiatrist threw her hands up in the air and declared there would be absolutely no more med changes until I saw a neurologist. She found me one who specializes in movement disorders. Have you guessed yet?
                                  Parkinson's disease!

I saw the neurologist yesterday. We were with her for well over an hour and she did several tests and eventually she shared her diagnosis of  Parkinson's disease. It is not curable but it is treatable. I have lots to learn about this oddball disease. You can ask Google about it yourself, if you're interested in details. I've already ordered books. There's even one called Parkinson's Disease for Dummies!

And, yes, I am shocked.  But I feel more relief than anything else. 
I started the new medication yesterday and the doctor expects that I will feel better within two weeks. My household feels as if a triumphant celebration is occurring even though we are certainly aware of the seriousness of this disease. I will not die from this; I'll die WITH it. Strange words and a strange way to end this blog but I feel happier and more encouraged than I have in months and months.

Here's To Happy Health!

The time has come for me to share with you that I have finally gotten relief from the hell I suffered from Major Depressive Disorder. I capitalize those letters to add emphasis to the serious pain caused by this not all together understood ailment.

You might recall that I started experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety after going through some distressing family problems last winter. The symptoms only became worse after trial and error with medications that only made the downward  spiral more dramatic. By summer time I was barely able to leave the recliner let alone the house.

Then I finally found the right doctor who put me through careful paces to come up with the right combination of meds. It was a slow process but things started to swing in the right direction about a month ago. I feel strongly that I'm on the right track. The symptoms have subsided to a very low point and I can almost say they're gone. I say "almost" because I know now that I am "hard-wired" to experience anxiety and depression and will stay on meds for the rest of  my life. There are still a few things that are hard for me to  do. For example, handwriting doesn't come easy for me anymore. It's easier to type.  For things that need to be handwritten, I have to get help, but that's no big deal. 

Altogether, I declare myself happily on the path to being my cheery self again thanks to my own diligence and that of my good doctor.

Remember: Be ultra careful with your medications no matter what you take. Know everything you can about them. Also, always be proactive about your health asking every question you can think of when you make any visit to the doctor. You are ultimately the one who bears the most responsibility for your health.

Good-bye, Kristi!

Kristi Lechner passed away early yesterday morning. She was near to being a perfect human being, as far as I can say. Her hair was always in place, her stylish clothes were from the best stores. She was in every which way appropriate for whatever the occasion called for in dress and demeanor.

Above the level of appearance, Kristi had a kind heart. She was on the shy side which many people didn't understand. She had a good word to say about each person in her realm. She was generous and understanding.

Kristi's handwriting was excellent. Whenever she sent me a memo or a card, I always studied her brand of cursive and thought about what a good student Kristi must have been from the time she entered the classroom until she left it at retirement. 

This was a woman who truly understood how school politics worked. Think back to her "good word for everyone" policy.  It worked so well for her as she spent all those years as an effective leader at OCHS.  It was not possible to discern her prejudices, if there were any.

She had an instinct for understanding her students to their very cores. I don't think she forgot a single one of them in 30 years of teaching. I never heard her say, "Oh, I just can't  remember her name." She knew every time. She also graciously passed on hints about the best and worst things about students we'd receive from her classes so we could best serve them.  

She loved to go out to lunch on in-service days. Her classroom was always tidy and tastefully decorated. She kept meticulous to do lists.  She was on time for everything. She took everyone at his or her word. She participated in student activities with dedication and energy.

Whenever we were out and about, she always left first because she wanted to get home to Lance so he wouldn't miss her. They were devoted to each other.

All of us will miss her forever. 

Depression, Doctors, and Drugs

(I need you to know right off that I have omitted doctors' names and exact dosages of drugs mentioned in case any of my readers are even remotely connected to depressive disorder. It is so tempting to self-diagnose or to diagnose for a loved one. The internet is ultra-loaded with information about the treatment of depression and it is hard to resist self-medicating. In addition, I want to remind you to be careful about willing acceptance of what doctors have to say. Sometimes they are wrong. Question them politely but thoroughly before you follow their directions for medication. I believe that I was given reasonable advice but that the advice was not appropriate for my personal situation .Be careful with your health. It is truly the best thing you have.)

Notes from my log:

6/16/17-Bad night with wakefulness and bad anxiety. Woke with feelings of doom and gloom. EXTREMELY shaky.No appetite. Unhappy.Took a xanax around 4:00. Anxiety calmed down a bit within 20-30 min. But noticeable brain zaps, sluggish  movement. 

7/7/17-Up at 7 feeling shaky and full of dark mood. Jittery at breakfast. Decent appetite. Felt better after a long nap. Less shaky. Not horrible in p.m. Arm relaxed a little. No xanax today.

8/1/17-Shaky, moody wake up. Started my daily stint in recliner in the middle of  the a.m. Pat brought me a small lunch and I slept most of the afternoon. Small dinner and a restless evening on the couch watching TV with Pat. Cannot get comfortable.

8/21/17-Eclipse day. I cannot forget this day because this is the day I noticed I was feeling better. The improvement was only slight but doom and mood were both a bit better. My appetite is back!

9/11/17-I definitely feel better. Meds have been adjusted one more time and another one added. Doc said I'd feel better within a week and I did! Doom and gloom are GONE. Totally gone. I do get extra focused on things but not to a point of anxiety. And I can dial down my racing thoughts with some effort. Love feeling happy.

10/1/17-Am declaring myself nearly well. All that's left is shakiness and slow motion movement. Those symptoms do present some problems. I can't write very well and typing is slow with many corrections needed, for example. But I am dealing with the problems.


I am currently under the care of an excellent psychiatrist and a neurologist who is working on my shakiness. This is still a bit of a mystery but we'll figure it out. We're also still working very conservatively on my meds and making good progress.

My message to you is that I caution you once again to question every medication you take whether prescribed or over the counter. Be proactive about your health. Nobody cares about it as much as you do.